Goddess’s Suffering Chapter 36

Goddess-sama, Secret Talk

Leaving our tired body to the bus and train, we drowsily went back to my home town, we decided to went back to my apartment after buying food at the usual supermarket.

Of course, during shopping, Amaletta and I went 「Not raw! Raw is not good! Just malt beer!」 「Give it back! Stop phrasing it that way too! Also, don’t just buy pudding!」 and other things we argued on the way. Meanwhile, Fellrose turned her look of jealousy in the name of monitoring at me. Is this look fun to you?

Well, I managed to get through today and safely arrived at my apartment. My life is no longer equal to zero.

「I’ll take a bath first, alright? I will prepare dinner as soon as I’m done.」

She said that while putting the food in the refrigerator, I gave her an OK as I sat down in front of the low table.

After Amaletta went into the bathroom, humming all the way, Fellrose stood still in front of me as if she had waited for the timing.

Seeing her expression that looked like she wanted to say something, I asked her while showing my weariness.

「So? Do you understand something after this entire day?」

「Regrettably, I was able to understand the fact that it has become a grave situation」

「Grave situation?」

I parroted the words Fellrose said with displeasure. Honestly, I have completely no clue on what she found after following us just playing for an entire day.

Fellrose nodded with a mysterious look on her face and, as if she didn’t want to be heard by Amaletta, she toned down her voice.

「It’s probably the first emergency situation since the creation of the Realm of Reincarnation… But…… before I talk about it, there is one thing I want to ask you.」

As I encouraged her to continue with my head, Fellrose narrowed her eyes.

「You are, that child…… Amaletta, what are you going to do with her?」

「I don’t understand the purpose of that question.」

「I don’t have any ulterior motive with that question. But you know as long as you refuse to be reincarnated, she will remain bound to this world, right? Is that what you desire?」

When asked by Fellrose who shot me a sharp glance, I thought for a bit.

In the first place, we didn’t start to live together by choice. For me, it was because I didn’t want to be kicked from home, while for her, it was to get a place to live in this world, there is a reason for us living together.

No, that reason is already a sophism.

If I’m asked whether I want to bind Amaletta, the answer is already obvious.

I stood up from the low table, look straight at Fellrose, and then confessed my true feeling.

「I said this many times, I don’t want to be reincarnated before I die. Living together with her that started with a certain chain of events doesn’t feel bad…… Speaking of which, you already know that, don’t you?」

「There are more reasons you don’t want to die now…… and that reason includes that girl. Am I correct to assume that?」

「That’s right.」

Amaletta might not have noticed because she’s stupid. No, I also just noticed recently. Every time she makes a mistake, every day I spend living with her, I have fewer and fewer reasons to be reincarnated. It’s ironic.

With a carefree song that came from the bathroom as a BGM, Fellrose, understanding my intention, let out a sigh.

「I see…… then I have no choice but to take a stance of do-or-die resistance.」

The Goddesses sure like their do-or-die resistance.

「From now on, as long as you don’t release Amaletta, be prepared to have me always follow you around. I will harass you thoroughly within the limit of interference rate!」

「Ahh, sure.」

I drooped my shoulder when I heard Fellrose’s declaration as she pointed at me and hitting the low table. Harassment……

After standing up from the low table, with a rough breath, she left to the entrance once her business finished. But, I suddenly remembered her words and spoke to her back.

「By the way, about the talk before, what do you mean by a grave situation?」

To my question, Fellrose’s shoulder twitched and she stiffened, and then with her back still turned toward me, she opened her mouth.

「…I don’t want to admit this, but I don’t feel any desire from Amaletta to reincarnate you.」


Is that possible for someone that whenever they talk, they will surely slip the word reincarnation somewhere like Amaletta?

While I was distracted by the unexpected line, Fellrose looked back at me, grinding her teeth.

「Ahhh annoying, so annoying! Forgetting one’s duty as a Goddess of Reincarnation, drowning in entertainment, infatuated by the other worlds, it’s preposterous! If left as is 『Deus Ex Machina』 would manifest and everything is because you deceived that girl!」


Suddenly, she passed the responsibility.

No, isn’t it 100% her own responsibility for drowning in entertainment? At least, I have never involved in that.

「I will not give up! I will do my best to harass you, and I will surely kill you…… I will make sure you’re reincarnated!」

Showing a glimpse of her disturbing real intention as a parting remark, she ran away, leaving the door open.

While my cheeks twitching from the unreasonable development, Amaletta showed up, dressed in pajama, with her face blushed from the heat.

「Hmm? Where did Fel go?」

She didn’t know about our talk so she tilted her head as she asked that. I only shrugged my shoulder and went to close the front door.

「She got a sore tummy, so she went home.」

「Is that so? Even though I already planned to do my best to make today’s dinner, well, there’s no helping it if she got a stomachache.」

While watching Amaletta who looked disappointed she couldn’t serve Fellrose her homemade cooking as dinner, I had an indescribable feeling.

There is no proof that Fellrose’s observation is correct, but I don’t think the words from someone who has spent a long time together with Amaletta is groundless.

「Hey, Amaletta……」


In the middle of taking foods out of the refrigerator, Amaletta looked back. Her eyes were that of an innocent girl, not of someone who had lived for a long time, that was why, I was being skeptical with Fellrose’s words.
———Don’t you want to reincarnate me?
I swallowed back the words that were on the tip of my tongue.

「… Make something nutritious.」

Instead, I said something normal, Amaletta responded with a laugh and grin.

「Yes, leave it to me!」

As she wore her apron and went to the kitchen, I thought while looking at the wings on her back.

I wondered what answer I wanted from the question I couldn’t voice.

———How stupid.

After shaking my head to shake off the obvious answer to that, I took out a can of beer from the fridge and drank about half of it at once.

「Ahhh! You’re drinking before dinner again! It’s not good if you drink it now instead of after dinner!」

「Today is fine, it’s a reward after I worked so hard.」

「It’s still not good!」

While looking at Amaletta who was angry at me with a ladle in her hand, I breathe a sigh of relief. But to escape from that reason, I drink the beer all at once.

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